A little more healing

Believe it or not, my trip to Pennsylvania was yet another way of God's gracious hand on my little journey here on earth. Being with my friend Joy and the Mentzer family was a privilege. In some ways, I felt like one of their family as I shared many quiet moments with them (especially Joy, her husband Derrick, and her dad Roy) in their home throughout the several days of my visit. And, of course, the opportunity to be with my family and receive BIG hugs of support that we longed to share just six weeks before was an absolute delight.

Unbeknownst to each other, four of us (Joy's high school friends) committed to fly or drive many miles to support our friend in whatever way we could. This was such a God-thing as we reconnected again, this time as young wives/mothers again in the same season of life. It was also an honor to sit with another long-time friend and hear her heart. I'm not certain that we've connected on such a deep spiritual level in a long time, and it did my heart good to know that she trusted me with her thoughts.

The actual funeral was completely and utterly dedicated to celebrate LaVerne's life on earth and most importantly her faith in Jesus Christ alone. As her daughter-in-law shared, LaVerne literally fit the description of the virtuous woman in Proverbs 31. As the wife of a farmer, she knew how to work hard and wasn't intimidated by any task. As a trained nurse, she was compassionate to others and sought to support with her skills. As a lover of God's creation, she took care of the gardens and beds around the farm in a way that surely pleased Him.

I have many precious memories of her in her home ... usually in grubby clothes with dirty hands, coming in from outside to enjoy the distraction from work to visit with me and Joy. Since Joy and I played basketball (w/Joy's brother Jon as coach), LaVerne was at every game and was quick to come to our side if any of us "went down" on the court (mostly that was Joy!? :) Of course, the days and hours leading up to Joy and Derrick's wedding and reception in the field ('02) are truly glimpses of the Mentzer family in action. Since I was a bridesmaid, I fell in line and worked my tail off like the rest of them to pull off Joy's dream. But the greatest impact that LaVerne Mentzer had on me was simple ... she cared about me. The times spent laughing, chatting, enjoying each other's company in spite of the years that separated us are invaluable.

I knew that this visit would be a testimony to God's work in my life and more of the healing of my own hurt from the loss of our daughter. You see, Coach (Jon) became a father during basketball season. I remember the little sign that LaVerne made for the wall by the snack shop that announced TJ's birth. It was awesome to share that moment. As I headed off to college and the years passed, Joy told me of Jon and Pam's subsequent children that were lost in either miscarriage or early infancy. I'll never understand how one family could go through so much pain. As expected, these grandbabies were mentioned in LaVerne's service and those moments brought healing for me. Pam's rendition of I Bowed on My Knees and Cried 'Holy' during the service was an awesome testimony of her own strength and healing that only God could bring about. At the graveside, Jon wiped the snow off the two tombstones nearby that honored the short lives of Aleah and Gavin. It was an honor when he pulled me aside to show them to me. I can't explain it, but it brought a certain amount of closure to our loss too.

You know, God is good and again I'm honored that He displayed so much grace to me in the many details of Hannah's short time in our family. God prepared my heart to desire a more eternal perspective back at the women's retreat just days after I found out I was pregnant w/Hannah. He knew that I indeed would learn that my life on earth will never be completely satisfying. And now, just six weeks after her death, I was challenged again in a very real way to long for heaven, my real home, as I watched a friend say farewell to her mom. Again I'll reiterate, if God seemed to think that Hannah's life and loss was essential to our knowing Him better and serving Him here better -- which is my belief -- then He was so kind and compassionate in His dealings with me. I'm forever grateful. (yep, go ahead and sing it!)